Post-match bile West Ham 1 Bolton 3 21 August

So all of the anxiety over lost season tickets proved to be a waste of time.  Just like the performance of the "team".

There is, of course, a dreadful inevitablity about losing to Bolton.  We always do, home and away, and often for the same reasons - our defence is unable to cope with the determination, power and aggression personified by Kevin Davies.  Not that what he does is a surprise, he's consistent every season, every match.  And so are our defenders.  Bullied out of the game.

Whereas our own forwards are (and always are) dominated by the defenders.  In the end, Bolton always want it more and always get it against West Ham.

In the first half, Bolton missed two good chances in the first 15 minutes, both gifted by sloppy crossfield passes that Bolton players devoured.

Then we started to come into the game.  Barrere looked lively and Dyer lasted the whole of the first half against all our predictions.  We got a fairly soft penalty that Cole proceeded to miss to no-one's surprise (including his own by his reaction).  Dyer hit a post from a good inside run and should have scored but that was it until half-time.

And then we proceeded to build on what was clearly another inspirational half-time teamtalk by scoring an own goal after 2 minutes of the second half.  In doing so, Upson got a kick in the head from Davies, which was what I would have liked to do to him along with most of the rest of the crowd.

After that it was pretty much predictable.  We huffed, puffed and substituted and then Elmander scored with comic freedom.  Lee had acres of space on the right as Ilunga ambled across to "mark" him and Elmander was similarly unmarked in the area to head home.

More huffing, puffing and substituting including the lesser McCarthy (less than last year's blimp, anyway) to replace Dyer who amazed us all by lasting 75 minutes and not going off injured.

The we got a very, very soft penalty (for Parker appearing in the six-yard box, it must have been) and Noble pulled rank to score.

So, of course, we gave Matt Taylor plenty of room to feed Elmander to score almost immediately.  Grant took Cole off so the crowd could boo him singly rather than wait for the end (and when there was still about half the home support present) but we'd all given up.  Rather like the team.

At half-time the announcer greeted a lot of kids who were attending their first game at Upton Park.  This is what they'll need to get used to if they are going to come regularly.

And, you heard it hear first, GRANT OUT!! (and Sack the Board, too)